2: Everyone’s Maid

Dear Anne: Too often I find myself spending my precious minutes at the end of the day cleaning everyone’s mess, and I’m exhausted. Help! -Not-So-Merry-Maid

Dear Not-So-Merry-Maid: Well said. One of the few downsides of kids being home all day for schooling is that there is a greater amount of time to make dishes and mess. Consider how to incorporate “Home Ec” as one of the subjects you teach your kids this semester—whether that’s cleaning, cooking, or organization. Don’t be afraid to pare back extracurriculars for a few weeks and even lessen academics a little to invest time teaching the incredibly valuable life skill of Stewardship. Check out our free resource “Age Appropriate Chores” on the Links to Experts page. Make consistency your friend—insist on work being done before play, and everything picked up before bedtime. Teach your children to show respect for their home and family—and ultimately themselves—by modeling how important it is for each member of your team to do their best to make your home something you can enjoy together.

Dear Anne: My daughter is a packrat and at the age of 8 has her closet filled with stacks of old art and crafts I would just as soon throw away. I don’t want to break her heart, but the amount of flotsam is ridiculous. -Stuff Exterminator

Dear Stuff Exterminator: Boy, do I hear you on that one. I had the same issue for years with one of mine—we eventually ended up with a solve that worked well for all of us. First, I suggest giving your daughter a “treasure box” she can fill with anything she has created that “won’t rot” (yes, we had to add that part for our kiddo). Whatever she keeps is her call. Once the box is full, she must decide what to do with the remainders. Possibilities include some combination of: taking a photo of the treasure (to maybe keep in a scrapbook or digital album), mailing the treasure to a grandparent to decorate their fridge (we mailed stacks and Grandma felt so loved!), donating some of the nicer “art” to nursing homes and passing them around to the patients (they adore visits from children and homemade artwork), and trashing it. At the end of the day, that is her one and only box for her creative treasures. Learning how to sort trash from treasure has been a huge life skill for our daughter—painful at first, but so valuable. Sure, she still collects stacks of boxes from Costco with birthday-level-glee about building hospitals and hotels for her stuffed animals, but I see that as a great thing. We set up healthy boundaries in advance about how long the tower of boxes can be in her room (usually a week) so we can celebrate her creativity while encouraging good stewardship of her living space.